Brokenness

I don't think anyone is truly broken until they are faced with their own evil heart. Once you truly know your own sin, a sadness settles into you that is entirely difficult to shake. I'm not talking about seeing what everyone else says about you. No, I mean once you see through the eyes of God just how desperately wicked you are. When you want to crawl under a rock and never return to the living.

Yet, somehow I persevere. God yet loves me and needs me to learn this lesson.

One has two choices when faced with despair:

1. Settle into it, like a man laying face down in the mud and just choosing to wallow in it. Allow it to pervade your being and then grow roots of bitterness into your soul, so that every time you are presented with the topic again, bitterness rises like a familiar old friend, and then anger overtakes you.
2. Take the sadness to God. Allow yourself to be broken before Him, humble before His Lordship and majesty. He is your daddy and He cares about every tear you cry. He cares about the state of your heart and wants you to heal. And only He can help you heal from the harm you have done to yourself and others.

It has been too easy for me to prescribe actions and scriptures, when in fact my own heart has been too dedicated to bitterness. I am beginning a journey of trying to dig up these roots of bitterness and throwing them on the fire. With God's help, my heart will be rich soil worthy of planting his seed within and wonderful fruit can finally grow in my household.

Porn Use as Grounds for Divorce

This article on Covenant Eyes is just about the most balanced and fair treatment about this topic that I have ever read. Make sure to read to the very end, because he gives many proofs from the scriptures, and prescribes a very biblical course of action:

http://www.covenanteyes.com/2015/10/08/porn-use-as-grounds-for-divorce-how-my-opinion-changed/

The gist of the article is that though porn use by a spouse should not be used as a hair-trigger reason for divorce, nor should it be used as an excuse for divorce after the porn user has long since repented, an unrepentant spouse that continues to commit adultery in this manner is breaking the marriage covenant continually and binding themselves to other partners. After the offended spouse and the church confront the porn user in the Matthew 18 manner, if the porn user is still unrepentant and has a hardened heart, then similar to excommunication, the spouse may need to separate or divorce the unbeliever. It should be a long, drawn out process allowing plenty of time to repent and rebuild the marriage.

But I would say that God hates divorce, and there should never be any reason to divorce unless all options have been exhausted, the church being in complete agreement that the spouse has done so. Just as the covenant is made in front of the church, it should be broken in front of the church, with no other options finally being available. Left up to the emotions of one spouse, divorce is all to convenient and an easy option, and their emotions should be kept in check so elders can come in and counsel both parties.